Imagine you’re on a date with your partner, and a thrilling thought crosses your mind: I want to tease the hell out of them. You’ve already built trust, explored each other’s preferences, and you share a deep connection. Yet, sometimes, routine creeps in, and things feel a little predictable.

Enter soft BDSM, the perfect recipe to spice things up. Warning: You might just love it.

Step 1: Prep the Ingredients

The stars of this recipe? You and your partner. The spices? The activities you choose to explore together. Before diving in, preparation is key. Decide who will take on the dominant role and who will be the submissive. If you’ve been together for a while, this dynamic may already be clear. If not, now’s the time to explore and experiment.

Next, grab a pen and paper. Both partners should write three lists:

1. What you want – Fantasies and desires you’d like to try.
2. What scares you but excites you – Activities that seem a little intimidating but intriguing.
3. Hard limits – Things that are completely off the table.

Don’t forget to agree on names you can call each other during play (like Sir, Mistress, Baby Girl, etc.) and establish a safe word to stop the scene if needed.

Now comes the negotiation. Remember, this is a shared experience meant to fulfill both of your desires. It’s not the time to focus solely on your own preferences—mutual enjoyment is the goal.

Step 2: Pick Your Spices

With your lists ready, it’s time to choose the activities that appeal to both of you. As BDSM enthusiasts, we’ve prepared a menu of soft BDSM ideas for you to consider. Keep an open mind, stay empathetic, and enjoy exploring together.

1. Sexual Service

The dominant partner gives specific instructions to the submissive, who must follow them precisely. This can include anything from how to undress to how to please their dominant.

2. Age Play

Engage in a playful scenario where one or both of you pretend to be younger or older. This can add a creative layer to your dynamic.

3. Sensory Deprivation

Heighten your partner’s other senses by taking away their ability to see. Use a leather blindfold if you enjoy the material, or grab something you already have at home, like a scarf or handkerchief.

4. Impact Play

Gently spank firm areas of the body, like the buttocks, with your hand, a paddle, or a belt. Avoid sensitive areas like the stomach or back.

5. Bondage

Restrict movement using ropes, handcuffs, or chains. If you’re new to bondage, start with simple ties or under-the-bed restraints.

6. Genital Worship

This involves giving undivided attention to your partner’s intimate areas. Think licking, shaving, massaging, or even cleaning as a part of your erotic play.

7. Forced Masturbation

The dominant partner instructs the submissive to masturbate in their presence. This can serve as foreplay or a form of playful humiliation.

8. Face Slapping

Used sparingly, gentle face slapping can add an element of control and intensity. Always discuss limits beforehand and keep it moderate.

9. Wax Play

Drip warm wax onto your partner’s skin for a unique sensation. Use low-temperature candles made specifically for wax play—avoid beeswax, as it burns too hot.

10. Anal Beads

For adventurous couples, anal beads can be a great way to stimulate nerve endings during foreplay or sex.

Step 3: The Final Touches

Once you’ve chosen your activities, it’s time to dive into your scene. Remember, communication, trust, and love are the foundation of any successful BDSM experience. Take the time to check in with each other, both during and after your play.

A Rule for Life (and BDSM)

Communication is the key ingredient in any relationship, and BDSM is no exception. Only you and your partner know what works best for your dynamic, so stay curious, explore with care, and enjoy the journey.

Ready to level up your erotic games? Check out Latexy for high-quality restraints, harnesses, blindfolds, and more. Let the adventure begin!